There was a time in my life when music was what controlled me. Everything I did and everything I thought about was based solely around the music and bands I liked. This morning I was digging through some of my old CD’s and came across “Full Collapse” by Thursday. The first time I heard this CD was literally the day I became enthralled with music. As I listened to that CD this morning, I began to think about how much my life had changed since those “music scene” days. The music didn’t catch me like it used to. Sure, it was great hearing a sound that was so familiar, but there was one thought that hit me harder than anything else this morning, and that was, “What has taken the place of music in your life?”
I desperately wanted to say that my relationship with Christ had taken ahold of me and everything I did and everything I thought about was based around Christ, but I knew that wasn’t true. Anyone who knows me, knows that climbing is the thing that now controls most of my thoughts and time on any single day.
I wake up, eat breakfast, brush my teeth, get dressed, and immediately go to my computer to check all the climbing blogs, climbing websites, climbing scorecards, climbing videos, and climbing pictures that have been updated. I then leave for work, and from the time I get in my car to go to work until the time I get home from work, my mind is fixated on climbing. I then go to class, and as I am sitting in class, trying to pay attention to lecture, in the back of my head I am always thinking about climbing. I then go home from class, and if Daniel is home, there is always a minimum of 5 minutes spent discussing climbing news from the day. On a normal day we probably spend anywhere from 30 to 60 minutes total talking about climbing news. On days I don’t have night class, I go to Ibex, climb for as long as my fingertips and forearms can take, go home, eat, and then before going to bed, do a wrap up on the days climbing news by scavenging through all the climbing websites and blogs again.
Is this unhealthy? In a physical way? Absolutely NOT. I am in better shape now than I have ever been in my life. Hands down. Climbing has been a big part of this, and climbing continues to push me to get in better shape so I can climb harder. In a way to feed my competitive spirit? Absolutely not. I have never been involved in an activity where I could compete against myself as much as I can with climbing. I am naturally competitive, and I need competition from time to time. With climbing I am constantly competing against myself to see how hard I can climb on a certain day. In a mental way? Absolutely NOT. Climbing is a mental test. It pushes me to do things which I think I can not physically do. In a spiritual way?
It is absolutely unhealthy, in my case. Not that it has to be, but this is the entire point of my blog entry. As I listened to that CD this morning, I began to think about how I have always had something in my life that controls all my thoughts and time at any given point. Fishing, baseball, music, climbing, whatever it be. BALANCE. This was what I have never had. I need to find a balance in my life where both my spiritual and physical self are being challenged and strengthened each and everyday. As much as I aspire to become the strongest climber I possibly can, I also want my relationship with Christ to grow. I need growth in my spiritual life. I need BALANCE.
